2017 reflections

It's a new year and I just wanted to reflect on 2017 on this neglected space.

The year started off rocky but it ended up with me throwing myself to focus on archi which I guess really helped with my grades in y1s2. Over the semester and summer, I made new friends and had an absolute blast. I've honestly never had that much fun literally we embodied the spirit of being young, wild and free but I eventually realised that it really wasn't for me. I was succumbing to peer pressure a lot and was making many bad decisions (which I didn't even realise were bad because I was accustomed to it). I was constantly surrounded by people but I was just so empty and lonely inside. Then came the worst week of this year - the craziest and wildest and most regretful week of the year and I guess I really thought that I was fine the whole time -until I realised I wasn't.

I've never said this to you and you probably will never read this space but thank you. I have no idea what spurred you to do so much for a stranger you barely knew. But thank you for planting a seed in me which made me realise that the lifestyle I was living was extremely toxic and unhealthy. Thank you for trying, for being someone who truly cared (even if just for a while), for making me start to believe that I could be worth something.

And then to my baby, thank you too. I've said it all to you before so I won't write a long (and public) essay here. But I'll say it here again and briefly. Thank you for bringing light into my life, for making me feel worthy, for always trying to make me happy and for being my shelter in times of stormy weather. We are both far from perfect so thank you for trying with me to make things work. You make me very happy b, here's to the year ahead (: